It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
