Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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