i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
