Im at strip club and am horny
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
look no pants
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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