belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize