Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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