What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Shame - the story of my life.
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