Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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