i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
