Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
