Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
