So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
