Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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