I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
