My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
