Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
