Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
