Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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