bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
