I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
