just come out here and I will go home with you...
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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