She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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