my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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