I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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