Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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