The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
