i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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