Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
