You really coming over, don't trick.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize