Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
