6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
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