At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I need a burrito and a hug.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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