it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
