i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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