i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
