Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
