In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize