i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
