OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
