she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
