Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize