STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
