when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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