I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
