sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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