It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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