i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
