woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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