If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Randomize
