And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
