I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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