so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
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